On being a bitch

I just got finished reading a bit from Bitch in the Bedroom: Your inner Bitch Guide to Men, Dating, and Relationships. “UG...WTF! Why are you reading that ish Tina!” Yeah yeah yeah.. like you wouldn’t. I’ve been a self-proclaimed passive, luckily not of the aggressive variety, for a while so a little balance is needed in my life and I understand this. Lucky I’ve been on the road to recovery for a the past year, since my life has been adorned with amazing friends accompanied with an incy wincy bit of drama, which required my passive ways be discarded for more direct means of communication, never would I call my actions bitchy just honest :D
Though I contend that LOVE carries our deepest conventions, and there our true selves are seen, including all our subconscious desires of what we see ourselves being currently and into the future. So with that backstory, integrated with the aforementioned self proclamation, I have only recently slightly been bringing my bitch(er) self in the realm of romance. Dare I try to equate bitch with truth, but I am going to try. The book it self tried to do the same, though it also says to not play games and I don’t know about you but I enjoy being on either side of that torrid dance, though I believe they are idealistic in their ideas of the desires of people. Do I blame him for not being caught on the proverbial net, because of the over eagerness of a naiveté? Absolutely not, I believe the dance of potential interest serves as space for energy to flow and catch, so enjoy the ride while being true to your nature.Nothing is worth having to adopt a foreign demeanor to catch the eye of friend or foe... unless it is for a social experiment of course *wink*

BE PEACE



@ IZZY'S IN ASHEVILLE, NC

Ur gurl on Memphis TV

Lesson on roadkilling

SMALLER THAN A COW, PLOW

Her name was HOLLYWOOD

Tuesday July 21, 2009 11:34am

Alright kiddies, sorry but grandma just dozed of for a bit, was I just talk’n about Nam? Oh yes thanks Sally, I left off when ole’ grammy nearly didn’t make back into the states after a trip to Canada... well it happened sort like this CHECK IT.

SO after leaving Canada we continued down towards Spokane WA for our rest stop for the night. it was already evening and the sun was dipping low behind the rolling hills and we were treated to a waning though in appearance full moon up in the sky. We stopped at a turnout and it seemed as if there where no people or cars for miles, and in response to the opportunity one of the filmmers Jason let out a holler that may have scared any mystical creatures that happened to meander by. After a relaxing look over the rolling hills of Washington we ended up like a hungry pack of dogs, and the only thing I wanted was a burrito. We found a town called Grand Coulee Damn City, and if you didn’t already extrapolate it from the title of the city it indeed received it’s namesake from the damn that bordered one side of the town. When going to places foreign (in the US) I always look for the following
How many American Flags do I see? 24
How many GOP signs do I see? 5
How many billboards/shops do I see soliciting gun fans? 7
How many Cut off shirt trucker hat combos do I see? 13
How many churches do I see? 5

So then I add up all the numbers and the number equates to a percentage, I was at 54% that I was in hill billy danger( though it was a small town, I haven’t found a way to take size into account). We stopped at a family diner ( I couldn’t get the thought of it being filled with the toters of “family values”) and luckily it was closed and it just so happened that the only place in town that was open at 10 pm was Las Presas MEXICAN FOOD, So after following the wrong directions we found a high couple that knew where the late munchies (learn spelling) were. We found the place of massive burritos and I got a vegi (off course) and a Bohemia. If you think pizza and beer is where it’s at you need a rewind because Mexican food and beer is the dig. After that we followed the moon to Spokane and spent the night in the city.
The next day we headed down to Coeur d'Alene Idaho, a lake town that was also the headquarters of the KKK. We stuck to a RV Park Island and the folks were sure nice. the day was dedicated to spilling our guts to the cameras, and after that tiring venture we went to the lake that fames the city, and water paddled though it. THOUGH it did not work out at all, and we would’ve got in trouble in weren’t for two pre-teen girls (one with a tongue ring) Ana and Jen. They also informed us that our teammate Calvin had known the whole time, when Vanessa and I were struggling in the broken craft he was riding the ebbs in his single water cycle, revenge still pending... We got into a Canoe and we found a little cove with geese and duck, and decided after a mini freak out sesh we picked up our canoe and walked in through tall grasses and warm muck at our feet and reached the lake once again and paddled back to shore. We got there and found a five buck recession proof pizza deal and we got a few, the pizza guy played some amazing classic rock, Crosby Stills and Nash. We came back home to a few beers and a cucumber goat cheese salad, and had a delightful sleep. The Next day we were planing a meeting with Chief Allen, the Tribal Council Chairman of the Coeur d’Alene tribe, but before we got to Tribal Council, we got some tobacco to give to him in an offering and we wrapped it into a parcel and tied some sprigs of sage to the outside. We met with him and he gave some advice on defining your own road and if you are surrounded by trouble it doesn’t mean you have to succumb to it, know you have endless potential and try to (11:11am !!!! in CA) live up to that. We then headed up north to visit Lisa a Roadtrip Nation supporter who brought the RTN Curriculum to a high school in Long Beach. She had a beautiful home on the lake, kayaks, a canoe, AND A MUTHA F%&*ING BOAT! I had never been in a motorized personal water recreation vehicle (MPWR (made up acronym( believe that I’m an inventor))) I am deathly afraid of water... because I had a bad experience YES! though mostly it is because I have such a respect for water, and what it’s capable of. THOUGH, maybe most important, I am not one to rest on thy laurels I decided to face my fears and get drug around on this large doughnut looking floatation device at high speeds. AND IT WAS FUCKING FABULOUS! I couldn’t get enough, and my biceps were sore for days from the death grip I gave those handles. To be in the midst of such a ghastly amount of water was nerve wrecking at first, but then I realized I am the water... I am a Pisces! Power to me...

Lisa was a fabulous host, though we needed to get on the way to Wyoming and on the way we saw two full rainbows stacked, which made it look like the pupil of Gaia.. So we winded our way till 11pm and decided to stop and sleep for the night in Moussula, Montana! Though All I saw that cloudy night was a comfort inn and a starbucks... they do not deserve capitalization, for they are far from proper. We got up the next morning and set out for Yellowstone. And upon arrival we were cautiously greeted at the point of entry by a snooty Park Ranger though it may have forebode the rest of our time in Yellow Stone. I should not put a hierarchy of nature but Yellow Stone to me was a Tourist porta potty. I was first disgusted when we came upon slow traffic and we came to find out (and did so ourselves) that everyone had stopped to look at deer drinking water at the rivers edge... REALLY? I wouldn’t have been surprised if it was all animatronics, they were not at all startled by the humans. Then we drove a ways down to a collection of earthly wonders... all conveniently located with a half miles walk ( 5 attractions in all) Fishy? To me, a all resounding yes can be heard cascading through my psyche. I also think I heard a motor. From there we continued en route south and saw the majestic Grand Tetons, a wonder full mountain range I had not expected anything from, besides a couple of fans back a t home, but I had never seen pictures or animations so I was in shock and in love. We decided to drive into town so we stopped in Jackson Hole, WY for some thai place that encourages people bring der booze... and we did. Chief Allan had given us two great bottles of wine and we pulled one out for this what seemed to be an epic dinner, though our food took forever and us with an empty stomach forced us all to get a little toasted... to put it mildly. We then went to the Cowboy Bar and being chocolate colored gets you looked at funny in a place like this, though it was nice to see a 90 something woman with a air machine not loose her desire to strike balls... in a game of pool of course. Though I left after five or so minutes and went back to sleep. The next day we had free but wanted to talk to a cowboy and we met up with Herald at the triple triangle dude ranch, which takes in city slickers and kountry kids alike for rafting on rivers and riding on horses. He was a sweet fella and offered us some yummy hot choco. It was interesting to meet someone who knew what exactly what he wanted to do with his life, and to be able to sit with him, on furniture his grandfather made, was special ( he was in his late 60’s I think). We then were recommended to go to the Buffalo Valley Cafe , and there the four got buffalo burgers and I, well I got a veggie burger... but of course. Though I wasn’t left out in trying local delicacies, I tried the forest pie, which had cherry, strawberry, rhubarb, and at this point I stopped the waitress and got it... I was sold at rhubarb! From there we drove to a Horse Outfitter and GOT TO RIDE HORSES! We paid and were given our horses..and mine horse was named.... HOLLYWOOD... of course. The only name that would have been able to compare was Erykah... but that may well be sacrilege. We trampled through the Grand Teton Wilderness and were treated to beautiful sunset which set the perfect atmosphere for enjoying those majestic peaks. We were out for three hours and it was perfect. My horse has attitude, and would not stop talking to her man friend horse back at camp but she chilled out when she was out of chatting distance to her stallion... literally. She was the perfect horse and if I happen upon an extra 5 grand I’ll take her. I was in such ecstatic bliss after the ride, and was ready to hang my head over my pillow and drop into a dynamic slumber, and we found a turnout overlooking the buffalo river and the Tetons so we didn’t find it difficult to settle on that location LIGHTS OUT, STARS UP the stars at night over a sky with almost zero light pollution was breathtaking, though it can keep it. The next morning we decided to head over to the Buffalo Valley Cafe again for some break fast food, though when we went to get up we saw our RV was surrounded by at least 50 head of cow. And what is quite disconcerting was they would just look at you with a blank stare while they munch on the grass (and evidently our RV) they stayed around for about a half an hour and left and by then we were ready for a good meal so we headed over to the cafe. It was a fantastical meal, served by our vegetarian waitress named Tina (Weird right), we then headed over to the RV. We were sitting there and a forward man came into the RV and I was a little tense about it, though he did seem quite nice. He informed us he was a Horse Whisperer , and we had tried to contact one the day prior, and I asked him if it was indeed him, Grant. And wouldn’t you know it IT WAS.... serendipitous? Absolutely, and for the cherry on top he said he rarely goes to that cafe and he felt called to come from GOD to that morning. He left his breakfast plans and took us to his ranch Diamond Cross Ranch, which was ironic because that morning I was looking at a beautiful barn, which happened to be his and also at the cafe they had napkins with a few dozen ranches in the area, and the only ones I remember were MC Lone (hehehhe) and Diamond Cross Ranch. He had some beautiful horses and he gave us a beautiful Demonstration on how to Horse Whisper , and it was based on one, he was going to speak their language, and two his Acronym TRUST (which can be absolutely applied to communication with Humans,
TRANSPARENT- if you are trying to be nice but are angry both people and animals can sense it... don’t fool yourself
RESPECT- enough said
UNDERSTANDING- you will be able to relate better if you put yourself in their shoes
SERVE- Give to them and they will want to listen to you
TRUSTWORTHINESS- enough said

This man we learned ran away from home at 18 with two mules he bought after a year working in the oil fields. He packed one and rode the other because he knew his potential lay somewhere else. And he floated through life doing what he loves, and at one time he went to a horse whisper of polo horses to a professional polo player himself. He said he did feel before like this path wasn’t for him, but through talking and seeing a mentor work with horses he was sold... he felt a mentor is everything... SO MENTOR UP! That is the best idea I’ve heard on this trip. Find someone who is living a life you respect, and ask for mentorship... people are nice... most of da time!

So we spent a couple hours with him and he had so much to share, though we had to get on our way and we drove to the city that is lucky enough to say they hosted my birth DENVER, CO! And I will let this part of the story end and I will pick it up soon PEACE

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At least I got to use my Passport...

Monday July 13, 2009 Billings. MT As you can see there is an unnecessary gap between when I live and when I type. I’m in Montana though I am going to choose to start with a meeting with a rock scientist/ inventor, and end with the near calamity at the canadian border coming into the USA... all I can say is CAMERAS EVERYWHERE... though as Gus from my Big Fat Greek would say in preparation of a good story... Hooookay! So after coming back from Bainbridge Island outside of Seattle, we made our way south to Kent, Washington To meet with Jordin Kare and after finding the location of his side project LaserMotive we moseyed over to Shake n’go... no it’s not sushi, it’s a dope ass burger joint, and hell yeah I said DOPE ASS... after refueling, we came back to interview Jordin Kare, and it was interesting to find out his passion with lasers came when he was a child building a laser kit that was advertised in a magazine. From there he saw his first laser glowing with a brilliant ruby light that illuminated not only a dot on the wall but his dreams. From then his trajectory was MAD SCIENTIST... he was not at all mad, he was quite gracious and unbashful about his awkward geekyness... what I learned from him is when things aren’t fun anymore, it is time to move on. And that is not saying struggle isn’t good, but for me when I am struggling over a video piece or an idea the struggle is the fun part, so when that’s not fun anymore, I can move on to a modified version of the project or something else completely. So after our three hour interview and a tour of his current project a SPACE ELEVATOR! powered by a 4000 watt laser (a standard laser pointer has 1/1000 of a watt) I drove the gang to the Canadian border, I was so excited to get the F out of the expletive cuntry (that is my favorite type-o EVER), though the entry into Canadia couldn't have been anymore reminiscent of a dystopic scene ( a la Children of Men), it was raining and there was no WELCOME TO CANADA! Instead the cars were ushered into a cattle like stable and one by one, we were corralled to the Mountie! He was not as happy as I had envisioned a Mountie to be, no cool red suit which made me think back to Rocky the Bullwinkle, and wonder if I had been lied to... but never the less, the surly Mountie spoke with us and with the asking of a few superficial questions and a scan of the Ole‘ passport we made out way to Vancouver, and I was driving like a bat out of hell... well maybe not that bad, though I had never driven in the rain and my excitement was hindering my judgement quite a bit. We saw no sky line of tall buildings, and we thought our expectations of seeing a big city were dashed though as soon as the freeway curved east, Vancouver's Downtown district was exposed to us and it was exactly what we expected. Though the clock said 2am so we decided to hold the after dark adventures til the next night. We slept in East Vancouver, and with the anticipation of the next days interview, (a yoga teacher/ poet/ blogger/ wino/ radio show host) Julie Peters. The next morning I woke up and headed to a coffee shop, and it ended up to be the coffee shop of my life, I had never had such a perfect Latte and I paired that up with a pumpkin bran muffin. Then we went and talked to Julie at the studio she worked at, and it was nice to talk to someone going through a transition ( she had just moved to Vancouver from Montreal, and was trying to get comfortable in her new home) after the interview Julie left for the airport to fly off to Toronto and visit her sick grandpa, and we stayed (of course) and did yoga with the studio owner Coco and it was not what I was used to, it was very fast flow yoga, and it did make you break a sweat but I didn’t like the vibe of the class over all, but maybe it was the uber sweating man in the speedo next to me that put a damper on the experience... ohhhhh pun kinda intended... Though after the class I felt rejuvenated, and what started out to be just a location for an interview ended up to be “Hippie and Dyke” center, and it was filled with good food and nice people. My favorite eat was a Coconut and Tiramisu Gelato (separate on the same cone) all I can say is it was kinda sensual, okay overtly sensual to the point I couldn’t see because my pupils were looking straight up at my third eyes, DIVINE I SAY. I wasn’t aware that Gelato could be so God damned good. We walked around and when night fell we got dinner at a pizza shop and was told by our cashier that what ever happens to the US by extremists is what America deserves because the American people do nothing as the Muslim word is being raped, and that if we really cared we would have killed Bush. Though I tried to explain to him, A some Americans are trying to bring justice and peace to the Middle East and B murder never solves ANYTHING in American political matters, esp with a puppet like bush... it could have been any other number of puppets... though the pizzaman made delicious pizza( pesto, onion, bell pepper, and potato)! We then went to Raw Canvas on Hamilton Street which was just off of Homer Street. You can paint there though tonight the painting area was closed because of a spoken world performance by The Unreal, a SF crew who very talented and I left completely inspired to do some sort performance art, because I recognize that I inhibit myself around people, though I secretly long to be my true self, which is not afraid of confronting strangers with thought provoking words and actions... so that is now on the frontier for me. We went back to East Van to go to sleep and at the bus stop we were approached by a young man looking to trade one of his graffiti works for a few dollars, apparently to get some Donaire (Kebab plate we figure), and so he graffited “Roadtrip Nation” and went on his way. The next day we went to interview a prop stylist at her blueberry farm in Surrey which was about 40 minutes south of Vancouver. We came back to the city after, and went to Vancouvers beautiful beaches and I was blown away. I felt like I was in Italy on the riviera, and there was even a large oak tree on the top floor of a 50 or so story tall condo building. I had some amazing Malaysian curry for dinner, I WAS BLOWN AWAY, Banana Leaf was its name and their are three locations in Vancouver. After we tried to find Salvador’s show at the Media Room in Vancouver, I had texted (impersonal but have you see international cell call prices? REDIC) him the night before and told him I couldn’t come, due to the fact we had a long drive ahead of us, though we found out our trip to idaho was much shorter than we thought, and I could go to the show! So I surprisingly surprised him ( Sal’s cell was off for said international cell call prices) when we saw each other we exchanged the BIGgest hug and the show was AMAZING!... PS, thank you Foreign Born and friends for letting me and my roadmate Calvin hang with you and letting us drink your beers... FB was soooooo good, I couldn’t stop dancing and the vancouver crowd was down for it, and it was an overall AMAZING show, and the perfect precursor to the next day. Luckily the RV was only parked a block away, so I walked back and went straight to sleep. We drove along the 3 freeway in Canada and it was one of the most spectacular scene. It reminded me of photo’s of the mountains of China. They had a very distinctive shape and color, and were utterly breathtaking... I recommend it... MAJOR So we got back to the US border but stopped to swim in the warmest lake in Canada Osoyos, and it was indeed perfect but by no means was it warm! After the pseudo bath we crossed over the border, and the border was MUCH more strict then the Canadian predecessor. They had cameras everywhere, the tables were turned, and we were as weak as a wounded calf ( Mid West specific metaphor, ahhh lets call it cowboy poetry!) so they caught us filming (which we apparently weren’t allowed to do)... so the asked us to come into their offices, I didn’t know where we were until I looked at the carpet and I was like “DAMN GINA!!!!! Homeland Security AGAIN!”. It was the second time in two weeks were detained for a by Homeland security, though they let us go on our way after a bit and we drove into Washington...

Evolutional Drift

These 9 drawings were done by an artist under the influence of LSD -- part of a test conducted by the US government during it's dalliance with psychotomimetic drugs in the late 1950's. The artist was given a dose of LSD 25 and free access to an activity box full of crayons and pencils. His subject is the medico that jabbed him.

My favorite:


Your? Click here to drop into the rabbit hole
and the accompanying soundtrack: Thievery Corporation - Strange Days (TC Doors Remix)

Words From Da Road, Homie Homes

Friday July 3, 2009 11:21pm

We Started out the trip in a great city called Sebastipol which was a great city of retired hippies and Santa Rosa techs, and the culmination of the two is a swanky but quirky town filled with educated and fine mannered people. We had an interview with Jay Shafer, the founder of Tumbleweed Tiny House Company that builds or sells the plans to teenie and tiny homes. It was so nice to see the house that Jay lived in, and I would even call it a tiny mansion on wheels. He gave us some great advice on “find out what you makes you happy, and get rid of the rest” and that thought really resonated with what I have felt but never put words to, then we made a quick gaunt to the city, San Fran, where we saw rolling clouds slowly taking over the city, though thankfully it never reached the mission which was our destination. We stopped and got lunch and ate it at the park where live and free jazz collected and entered my ears and into my mind. It was perfect, and we continued on and found parking (a gift) on the street corner of 20th and Valencia. And we continued on to do an interview with Aleks,the executive director Loco Bloco, a community group that does outreach with communities dealing with poverty and the problems that all too naturally come out of an atomphere of help and hopeless( And Aleks came out of one as well), and in this mission they teach children drums, dancing, gardening, theater, etc. Alex was an amazing woman, one who came out of poverty, a gang and with only half of her middle school done. I loved that she was more like a peer, she was only 25 years old when she became executive director and has been bettering the program ever since. She kept on telling us how lucky we were to be given this opportunity and it really made me understand this experience so much more, and the words she left us was something to the tune off “ Live to love” and I really loved that sentiment she left us. Then we decided to go see their rehearsal and it was great to hear the drumming live and when they stopped to talk it took a second as the vibrations slowly decompressed which was not only psychedelic but beautiful... Then we went out and I met a person that works for Ning.com, a org that I actually am interested in and she told me to keep her updated about my projects and I plan on doing so. It was interesting because she never worked for start-ups and esp in support so it was interesting reminder to look out for opportunity in every shape and form! So yeah then I came back to the RV and bummed a clove from Jason and it got me as high as you know what would, and it really was a shock. And now I lay ready for sleep GOODNIGHT!

Reflections!

Tuesday June 30, (hahaha I almost put 3009 and thought it was right) 12:04
SO two interviews later... On Sunday the sole prerogative was finding a practice interview and after a breakfast burrito at Wavos in Newport we were on a search for a good interview. After a couple internet searches and two failed phone calls we decided to go to the camp in Costa mesa to talk to an owner of a bike shop. The Camp is a very cool modern art complex that to me is reminiscent of a post Dystopic era. We saw a Birkram yoga studio and made it out second pick if we couldn’t get an interview with the bike owner so we walked in like we weren't up to something , and Calvin spoke with the owner and he was very friendly and open and he agreed to the interview very graciously. We walked back to the RV nervously and we were all kind of freaking out. Even when I first laid eyes on him I knew he was a very powerful person and when we eventually sat down I was assured of that. What really stuck with me was his advice that truly good ideas come before their time, so too believe in what you do and to always have a coffee shop around you (Friends that you can have an evolving dialouge with). Today at Yo gabba gabba was great and I appreciated his, what I’m going to call “sustainable” business, using your friends to create something great. I also liked being positive could actually sustain success. The studios were great, and I felt so lucky to be there, and after this trip I think of toys and skateboarding so different, I especially enjoyed his characterization that skateboarders are always on the look out looking at potential spots to do their next trick and it really was a very interesting perspective. After all that we drove to LA and it was so stressful, because we had missed the 91 north so I had to navigate a direction that I was not too familiar but we got to our location just fine but I was so pushed beyond my means I felt like was about to make like a drama queen and cry, luckily I was allowed to go on a little walk and the next street happened to be India st, so I hiked up and meditated while the sun sank behind the silverlake hills, and the scene was so beautiful, with jacaranda flowers strewn along the entirety of the street. After about 15 minutes I made it back to the RV, parked level on a street below, and I came into my fellow trippers having diner, as they began we saw a group of three walk past the RV with their left over from a theoretical dinner at Ginger Grass. I saw one of them looked a lot like MIA, and in Silverlake ish like this happens on the regular. They were looking at the RV and we invited them in, and one of the guys, who we found out to be Diplo insisted that the group come in, And they were stand offish, and before we asked if it was indeed MIA she called herself Maya and was stand offish. but they (Dip and MIA) signed the ceiling and that was the end of that, oh yeah she left us her soup... which was delicious. An hour later I met up with Sarah WHICH I TOTALLY NEEDED because I forgot who I was and after talking to her I felt so grounded... After being in a new place with new people exploring new ideas, it gets easy to lose yourself...